"- I figured out what it is, A! I don't love him anymore.
- Aren't you supposed to be up for work in like 90 minutes!? And I always said that would be the best for you.
- Yes, me too, I used to think he was so bad for me. And then I found myself all alone. And unable to do anything with myself.
- C, you're never alone!
- Oh yes I fucking am! How else do you think I managed to spend the last 8 hours crying!?
But I realized today that there is something that hurts more than someone cheating on you.
Do you know when you talk to someone and you just think to yourself that they're just so good they don't deserve to even have an idea about how you feel?
- It's nearly 6 am where I am so no, I don't understand yet.
- I'm sorry, I didn't know where you went. Were you sleep?
- Go on, kid!
- Well, if it wouldn't help them in any way or move them forward, what's the point?
...
...
- And why do you think you can decide that?!
- You just know, A, see? Its just a feeling that you get. And when you're anything like me, you'd rather take it in than...
- Are you talking about this other guy now?
- Ohhhh, man, you used to get me. It's not about any guys. It's about that fucking love. Hahahaha, " here lies Cristina. She had 2 great loves and only one fucked up relationship."
- You know what that guy said to you about Clara and Eva, you wrote on your blog a few days back. I see where he's coming from.
- I loved him and now I don't love him anymore. And earlier, I learned you can love without wanting someone. I mean, you want them, but you know what I mean?
- Yes, I know what you mean. You'd rather stay up for 8 hours than telling someone they're making you stay up for 8 hours.
- I can't blame anyone but me for this, A, so don't say it like that. You know that doctor you told me about?
- Yes, I'll forward you everything when I wake up. Are you sure tho?
- Yes. I can't stay up for another 8 hours again. It was time to go back to that anyway. It's been years. Anyway, you should know about love, you're old and falling inlove every other year.
- Yeah, kid, I fell inlove once and she's gone. This is for when I feel lonely.
- So you just live without love and changing girls my age so you don't feel lonely!?
- No, I have a family, you know? And I have you every now and then. I keep my loves around, I don't marry them.
- Hahahaha! Isn't that right? Great loves are probably not meant to be relationships at all, A.
- Go to sleep!
- I'm going to work."
And here I am, another 8 hours into my no sleep coma, no idea, and just a phone number in my hand.
One word. Seven letters.
T_ _ _ _ _ y.
Cx.
- I loved him and now I don't love him anymore. And earlier, I learned you can love without wanting someone. I mean, you want them, but you know what I mean?
- Yes, I know what you mean. You'd rather stay up for 8 hours than telling someone they're making you stay up for 8 hours.
- I can't blame anyone but me for this, A, so don't say it like that. You know that doctor you told me about?
- Yes, I'll forward you everything when I wake up. Are you sure tho?
- Yes. I can't stay up for another 8 hours again. It was time to go back to that anyway. It's been years. Anyway, you should know about love, you're old and falling inlove every other year.
- Yeah, kid, I fell inlove once and she's gone. This is for when I feel lonely.
- So you just live without love and changing girls my age so you don't feel lonely!?
- No, I have a family, you know? And I have you every now and then. I keep my loves around, I don't marry them.
- Hahahaha! Isn't that right? Great loves are probably not meant to be relationships at all, A.
- Go to sleep!
- I'm going to work."
And here I am, another 8 hours into my no sleep coma, no idea, and just a phone number in my hand.
One word. Seven letters.
T_ _ _ _ _ y.
Cx.
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