Where the hell is all that love going?!?!

I used to believe in love. And i used to believe that love never dies. No matter what. That all the dreams and hopes are not empty... I used to think that all the wishing to spend the rest of your life with someone can only happen once... And that there's only one person in the world that you'll want to love and protect forever. I used to believe in all that till one day when back home, I cried so hard my eyes were red for days. I felt my feet walking around and my blood going cold. I believed in signs and destiny and love until I had my heart broken for the first time. Then the pain was finally gone and I managed to understand that nothing's quite as bad... And that I'm never gonna fall inlove and go through that again. From a soul point of view. Useless to say that everything that happened next was completely different. After a few nice times that life threw at me, mixed with confusion and some obsessions, I met someone else and broke my heart again. That's how I found out it is possible to love more and fall harder while you feel trapped. Should I start telling you how I got to the conclusion that life can't get worse than that or would that be repeating myself? And now I wonder how many times will I tell myself that "I never felt like this before" and then let it go to hell?! Cx